Newsgroups: talk.bizarre Path: netcom.com!elvis From: elvis@netcom.com (kEvin) Subject: Mixed Emotions Message-ID: Followup-To: misc.consumers.appliances Summary: dinner party Keywords: dinner roast canned bridge Organization: NETCOM, But I'm Ok. Really. Date: Tue, 9 May 1995 07:00:42 GMT *DING* *DONG* "I'll get it!" I called to Sandra, intercepting her on her way out of the kitchen. "You stay in there and get everything ready." "Stall a bit honey, I'm running behind." I grinned. Tradition dictated a late meal at our place. Sandra always fretted over the delays, but I relished the chance to show off my skills entertaining with the blender. "Oh Hi Pete. Norma. You guys are right on time. Dinner's going to be late, why don't you let me mix you something cold to take your mind off the traffic. Here, I'll take your coats." "Oh, that must be Jane and her new boyfriend," Norma burbled. "They met when his toilet overflowed and the sewage leaked into her place. I hear he's a hunk, but she hasn't introduced him to anyone... JANE!" "NORMA! OMYGAWHDIAMSOGLADTOSEEYADIDJAHEARABOUTTHE..." Pete and I exchanged bemused expressions as the women went through their greeting. Not only did he have a couple of new ones, but he ended up with one of mine as well. Up to his old tricks again, the rascal. Jane's new boyfriend stood just inside the door taking everything in. He looked uncomfortable. "Come on into the living room everyone." I said while herding Norma and Jane, still excitedly chattering, down the hallway. "Dinner's going to be a bit late, so I thought I'd mix up some cocktails to hold us over." Pete smiled. And cocked an eyebrow at me. "Would you mind mixing one of your specials for Norma?" he whispered, "I don't think she's had one in a while." I winked my acknowledgement then turned to Jane's boyfriend who was lagging behind and looking uncomfortable. My, he was a hunk. Ten years younger at least and wearing a tight T-shirt that showed off his sculpted form to good effect. "Here," I said proffering my hand, "Jane didn't introduce us. I'm Bob and this is Pete." "unh Hi. Brad. Glad to meet you." I was about to say more, but Jane popped up next to me and grabbed his arm. "Come on sw-eeee-tt-eee you just have to say hi to Norma." Pete and I wandered over to the bar, and I started measuring out the extracts. Pete was fascinated by the gleaming stainless of the mixer and we chatted a bit about the proportions. "Whoa!" He exclaimed. "Aren't you putting way to much lust in Norma's drink? She'll never drink anything that strong." I chuckled. "No, you put in a bit of desire and the faintest hint of affection. They can taste the affection, and they suspect the desire so they just think that's all there is." "What's the lime for?" I frowned a bit there. "Tradition." "Brad. Would you like something?" I called. "Yeah man. You got anything canned?" He called back. Jane was aghast, but a proper host is prepared for anything, and I offered him a laugh track before she could upbrade him. We chatted for several minutes and I felt the warm glow of satisfaction spread through my veins. I'd mixed it myself and it was going to last at least through dessert. Dinner went beautifully, of course. Every nuance seemed perfect, and my admiration for Sandra was unsurpassable, at least by a single-malt. Unfortunately, Sandra impaled herself on the roast rack while clearing the dishes, and Brad's laugh track marked the event with a rolling gale of laughter trailing off into scattered titters of poorly restrained hilarity. Damn! and right before dessert too. Luckily, Pete and Norma were too distracted too notice. Jane, always the sweety, gulped down a flask of Mega-Bitch from her purse and helped me kill Brad. (I think she hits that stuff pretty regularly when no one's around) And we managed to make a successful evening of it. With four, you can play bridge. kEvin weak NT